Shifting perspectives through the lens of language
As a coach and lifelong learner, I’m fascinated by the intricate relationship between language and our ability to express ourselves. I notice at times how language can limit us – I mean how on earth do we language love?
Over the past couple of years, I have embarked on a language adventure, re-learning French and Spanish the aim being to be able to have more nourishing conversations outside of my own culture. This journey has been eye-opening, revealing that language learning is about far more than acquiring new words—it's about discovering whole new ways of experiencing the world.
The struggle for expression
Have you ever experienced a moment when you're bursting with emotion or you've just had a massive realisation, but when you try to explain it, the words fall flat? Don't worry; you're not alone. Our brains constantly play catch-up, trying to translate our inner world into something we first understand so that we can attempt to express it to others. It's ironic that language, the very tool meant to help us connect, can sometimes be the thing that holds us back.
"The limits of my language mean the limits of my world." -- Ludwig Wittgenstein
I think that this quote encapsulates the impact language has on our perception and expression. When we expand our linguistic horizons, we're not just learning new words; we're opening up new possibilities for understanding and experiencing the world within and around us.
A window into culture
Learning a new language offers a glimpse into different cultures and ways of thinking. As Federico Fellini said, "A different language is a different vision of life." My experiences with French and Spanish have illuminated this beautifully.
In French, expressions like 'joie de vivre' (joy of living) and 'bon vivant' (someone who lives well) reflect a cultural emphasis on enjoying life. Spanish, with its two verbs for 'to be' ('ser' and 'estar'), builds flexibility right into the language, distinguishing between permanent and temporary states.
These linguistic nuances don't just add colour to our vocabulary; they shape how we perceive and interact with the world. The French expression 'l'esprit de l'escalier' (literally, 'the spirit of the staircase') perfectly captures the frustration of thinking of the perfect retort too late—a universal experience that English lacks a specific term for.
Last year, when my language learning focused on French, I encountered numerous terms that didn't have direct English equivalents. These linguistic gaps often revealed cultural differences and priorities. It made me reflect on what we prioritise in English and how our language shapes our worldview.
Here are some of my favourite examples:
Dépaysement: This word describes the feeling of being in a foreign place or out of one's element. It captures both the disorientation and excitement of new surroundings. An English equivalent might be the phrase, discombobulating.
Flâner: The art of strolling aimlessly and enjoying one's surroundings without a specific goal. This concept highlights the French appreciation for leisure and being present in the moment.
Sortable: An adjective used to describe someone you can take out in public without fear of embarrassment. Its existence in French reveals social expectations around public behaviour.
Profiter: While often translated as "to take advantage," it more closely means "to enjoy" or savour a moment. This nuance reflects the French value placed on appreciating life's pleasures.
These linguistic nuances made me wonder: What concepts do we prioritise in English? How does our vocabulary (or lack thereof) shape our perception of the world? Exploring these "untranslatable" words offers a window into cultural values and ways of thinking that differ from our own.
Language in coaching: opening doors to growth
In a role as a coach, I've observed how the words we use can either open doors or slam them shut – and with a bang. A simple shift from "I'm not good at public speaking" to "I'm developing my public speaking skills" can dramatically change one's outlook and potential for growth.
Language impacts our personal development in numerous ways:
Shaping our self-perception
Influencing our motivation and goal-setting
Affecting how we interpret challenges and setbacks
Determining how we communicate with others
It's fascinating how a tiny shift in language can completely change your outlook. It's like giving yourself permission to be a work in progress (which, in reality, we all are). This linguistic flexibility is particularly powerful in coaching scenarios, where reframing situations and self-perceptions can lead to breakthrough moments.
However, there are times when conventional language falls short, particularly when trying to articulate profound feelings or describe transformative experiences. In these moments, we need to think beyond words.
Expanding our communication toolkit
When language reaches its limits, other tools can bridge the gap:
Metaphors and Analogies: Generally speaking, these can make complex ideas more tangible. For instance, using the metaphor of juggling glass and rubber balls to help someone prioritise tasks at work. "Which tasks are your glass balls - the ones you absolutely can't drop?" This visual representation helps to prioritise more effectively than a straightforward discussion might have.
[However, for some literal thinkers, metaphor can be challenging. When I was younger, I remember my headmaster asking us to use our mind’s eye – this foxed me for many years to come, I mean, how can a mind have an eye?]
Non-verbal Communication: Sometimes, a simple hand gesture can convey a concept more effectively than paragraphs of explanation. In coaching and training sessions, I often find that physical movements or expressions can communicate ideas that words struggle to capture.
Silence: In interactions with others, moments of quiet reflection often speak volumes, allowing insights to settle and new understandings to form.
By expanding our definition of language and communication, we open up new possibilities for understanding and growth. It's about finding the right 'language' for each individual and situation—whether that's spoken words, visual metaphors, physical gestures, or even a reflective silence.
Stretching our verbal boundaries
Given the profound impact of language on our ability to express ourselves and understand others, how can we stretch our vocabulary? Here are a few suggestions:
Never stop learning. Consider picking up a new language or even just a few phrases.
Read widely and diversely. Explore different styles, authors, and cultures.
Pay attention to the words you use. Try expressing the same idea in different ways.
Engage with people from different backgrounds/cultures. It is expansive.
Keep a journal. It's great practice for capturing your thoughts into words.
These practices not only enhance our linguistic skills but also broaden our perspective and increase our empathy. By exposing ourselves to different languages and ways of expression, we become more versatile communicators and thinkers.
The never-ending story of language
Language is an incredible, frustrating, and beautiful part of being human. It's always changing and growing, just as we are. My adventures in French and Spanish have taught me so much more than just new words—they've shown me new ways of seeing the world and understanding myself.
While language can sometimes box us in, it also has the power to set us free. Every new word, every new way of expressing ourselves, is like adding another colour to our palette. The more colours we have, the more vibrant and beautiful the picture we can paint.
As Flora Lewis aptly put it, "Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things." This perspective shift is what makes language learning so transformative, both personally and professionally.
Are you ready to add some new colours to your language palette? Maybe learn a new phrase, pick up a book you wouldn't normally read, or strike up a conversation with someone from a different background? The world of language is vast and full of surprises, as I am sure many of you already know.
Remember, effective communication, especially in coaching and training, often requires us to be flexible and creative. It's about finding the right 'language' for each individual and each situation. By expanding our definition of language and communication, we open up new possibilities for understanding and growth.
How do you think broadening your language skills might change your life or work? I'd love to hear your thoughts. After all, dialogue is always better when there is collaboration – don't you think?
Amanda Livermore is the founder of LORE Consultancy Ltd. She is a Professional Certified Coach (PCC) with the International Coaching Federation (ICF), a trained mentor coach and a coach supervisor.